You’ll Figure Out Motherhood - Cavemom DNA Ensures It

For moms-to-be, the idea of delivering a baby and nurturing it into adulthood might be overwhelming. You’re excited about heading down that road, but doubt is still knocking at your door: Will I know what to do? Will I definitely love my baby? Will I be any good at this?

Absolutely. Because mothering is positively prehistoric.

A few days after she was born, I had to go to a doctor appointment by myself and I thought, ‘No problem, I’ll just leave the baby with her dad.’ Then, when I was leaving the house, I broke down into tears because I thought, ‘Oh, I can’t leave her!’ It shocked me, because why was it so hard to leave her with her father?
— New Mom

Back in the day, cavemoms birthed a lot of babies to keep their species flourishing. They pushed them out, fed them, fussed over them and wielded impressive wooden clubs to protect them. So, how did cavemom know what to do?

Like generations of women before her, she was guided by DNA. Super-hormones (like oxytocin and prolactin) supported breastfeeding and created a magnetic connection between mother and child. As she cared for her infant, her hormones went to work, developing an unbreakable bond between cavemom and her baby. She needed these potent hormones to keep her on track so she didn’t leave her wailing baby by the side of the mammoth trail! In short, her biology had her back.

And it will have yours too.

In fact, your brain is so committed to its job, there may be times it overdoes it. Like if you find yourself convinced your husband will drop the baby so you can’t let him out of your sight. That urge? Not so helpful. Just remember it’s your devoted brain following longstanding, sometimes unnecessary, genetic grooves, and it’s in your power to notice them and take a more modern approach.


  • When you have an “extreme” reaction: Acknowledge it, assess the reality of the situation and try to gauge your response to what’s actually happening.
  • Try not to get caught up in what you think you don’t know. When a challenge comes your way, most times, you’ll figure it out. And when you don’t? There’s never shame in asking for help!